50 Shades of Shit

So obviously once a year there is always a book that catches everyone’s attention and it goes on the New York Times best seller list. I usually check out what books go on there because I’m a book nerd . I remember last year 50 Shades of Gray was the number one book everyone was reading. So I gave it a shot and got the book. Well it was a waste. I couldn’t  get passed  chapter seven, so it was horrible.

I don’t understand books like these (horribly written books) get the top best seller list. Apparently 50 shades of grey was a really good book, it was hot and  steamy, than again I wouldn’t know because I didn’t even get to that point. I thought the main character  was way to cliche. The thing is I couldn’t picture what the character even looked like, she had little description in her character. All I could tell she was a dumb ass bimbo falling for a asshole who had “AMAZING” looks. (Sounds like twilight)

I later found out this was a fan fiction of twilight. Oh, well that explains everything, but this time the main character don’t have a sparkly dick , just a very disturbed bondage problem. So basically Edward with a bondage problem. I have advice for this author.

1.

Come up with your god damn Ideas! None of this is original. 

2.

If you want to write a book take a God Damn Creative Writing course! This would much be appreciated . Considering most of the time when I was reading this I was counting how many cliches were within this book.  The creative writing course will help you.

3.

Get a new editor. Who ever edited this was fricken Horrible!!!! HORRIBLE! I had such a hard time reading this  shit and it seemed like nobody edited this. Work on your description and please stop it with the repeated phrases!!!! 

Listen, I’m not the best writer in the world, I know my writing is horrible and I hear it all the time. Honestly it annoys me  ,but one this is this is my blog, I don’t care.  I can’t help the way I write because I do have a learning disability. Basically my brain can’t suck in the information needed for Grammar and English structure, which is quite frustrating. 

Anyways, If I knew I wanted to publish my book considering my learning disability , I would hire a editor because I know I’m not good at writing. I would make sure that they edited it to the fullest . Nothing is worse than publishing a book with bad editing or no editing at all.  I would take pride in my writing so of course I would want it edited.

I remember I was chatting with Anne Rice on Facebook a few years back, she had good advice for me considering my writing. 

“My grammar wasn’t the best either, but I still wrote my stories. Never let that put you down.”-Anne Rice

I think about that every time I write , but again if I posted some thing life Fifty Shades , of course I would get bad reviews. If E.L James wanted good reviews she should have went back, re wrote her version of Fifty Shades, contacted a wonderful Editor and than get it published. The book seems like a first draft and that is why nobody liked the book. 

So anyways moral of this blog, don’t read it if you hate shitty books. This was fifty shades of shit …

 

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4 thoughts on “50 Shades of Shit

  1. I know what you mean.
    I actually did read the twilight books
    -I was young naive and thought the world should have stuck up glittery vampires and the movies were worse-

    But I won’t get too much into Twilight, though I do recall reading half-assed character descriptions.
    I like using my imagination but it was bit excessive.

    I haven’t actually read 50 Shades, I’m just not into it.
    The storyline just seemed like a type of porn you could play in movie theaters without being considered a “perv”.
    If it’s going to be a love story, so be it.
    I’m tired of seeing how someone gets one bad idea and everyone thinks that just because someone gets away with it, that there should be more of the same.

    Personally I’m not interested, though I do know of people who will go watch the movie when it’s out.
    It’s going to take a lot of junk food and a free meal to drag me to that one (not to mention a free ticket, that’s not coming out of my pocket)

    • thank you, that means a lot to me. Yes, the book was horrible. I was going to try to read it again, but I learned if I put down a book because it has no interest to me , don;t bother trying to read it. I tried reading Anna Kerenia and i just couldn’t do it.

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